The Wedding
It’s a given. We couldn’t wait to get married to each other. But we weren’t the only people that mattered.
On our wedding day, it was important to us to make it a special, fun day for our kids. After all, our decision to get married involved the blending of our five kids. That's a big deal!
The wedding day was a lot of fun for the kids. We packed snacks. We made sure no one was rushed. And the venue where we had our wedding was fun for our crew, with darts and games and fun rooms to explore.
We also did something that was unusual and special with our kids during the ceremony. It's something we've never seen before at a wedding, and no one else has seen it done either. We all painted together!
THE PAINTING
We sat the kids down a couple days before the wedding to talk about the big day. They were all excited, asking us who would do what. Tackling the practical questions first so they could calm down, we answered them one at a time. Yes, we would get dressed at our venue, The St. Vrain. Yes, they would be part of our bridal party. Yes, the boys would walk in with their dad. Yes, the girls would all carry bouquets. Yes, Evika and Elias would be Flower Girl and Ring Bearer. Yes, Emma would walk her mom down the aisle.
Gosh, it was so fun for us to see our kids so excited about the wedding. They were so excited about all of us becoming a family. We caught each others eyes over the tops of our kids heads and mouthed the words, I love you.
“Now, Meg is going to tell us about something really special that you all get to help with,” Kelvin nodded in my direction.
Everyone turned excitedly toward me. I tumbled my words through my head before spilling them out to introduce the idea of how we would all paint together. I said it simply, so it wouldn’t sound complicated and overwhelming. When I dumped out the paint colors and an assortment of small paint rollers and paint brushes, their eyes lit up and they began grabbing the different colors.
Each kid got to pick their own color. We gave them one rule for when we would all paint together. The only rule we gave them was to not paint over each other, because each person is important. Each person’s color matters. The whole idea of this plan was to let them know how important each child is in this family, each one making up a part of this masterpiece.
Kelvin talked to the kids about creating a legacy through blending our family. Many years from now, they will be able to look at the canvas and say “There’s my color.” We wanted each child to know they matter in this family, and this artwork would be a daily reminder of their sense of belonging in our home.
We were both well aware that some of the kids might not like this whole idea. Or they might change their minds and not want to paint with us on the wedding day. And that would be totally okay. Because the last thing we would ever want to do is make anyone feel forced to do something they didn’t want to do. Releasing all of our expectations for how this might turn out, we moved forward.
On the day of the wedding, after our vows were said to each other and to our kids, Kelvin and I began painting on the large, white canvas backdrop behind us with our own colors. Then it was time for the kids to join us. Our live musicians were singing the words from Prophesy Your Promise, the first song that Kelvin ever shared with me. My sisters helped pour the paint colors for each of our kids and they started painting on the canvas, too.
Except for one kid.
One kid, our oldest son, stood back and watched the rest of us paint. He didn’t join us right away.
Then he did something beautiful. He picked up a brush and stepped forward to add his color to our family’s artwork. Slowly and carefully, he added 7 hearts to the canvas… one for each person in our family.
Once we stepped back and realized what had happened, we cried. And there was not a dry eye in the room.
Our children gathered around us. Kelvin’s best friend, Pastor Micah Billingsley, pulled out olive oil that he bought in Israel and anointed us as he prayed a powerful blessing over our marriage. Each of the kids extended their hands in blessing toward us, a scene we witnessed later when we saw our wedding photos.
What God has Joined Together, Let No One Try to Separate
Before we got married, one of our pastor friends told us, “Right now love is broken in the eyes of your children. In your marriage, you have the opportunity to heal the way they see love.”
Our children have already experienced the absolutely devastating loss of divorce. They have witnessed toxic relationships and marriages crumbling. They will forever bear the scars of this loss. The sacred opportunity we have been given is to follow the way of God’s Love in blending our new family, to heal the way our kids see love. To see wholeness. To see healthy communication. To see faithfulness. To see tender affection. To see commitment. To see endurance. To see forgiveness.
The atmosphere in the room on our wedding day was completely saturated in Divine Love. Love created the opportunity for redemption. Love opened all of our hearts. And Love brought us together. Together, we are becoming more and more like Love every day.
“And above all, put on love, which binds us together in perfect unity.”
Colossians 3:14
WEDDING CREDITS
Venue: The St Vrain
Photography: Sarah Pagano Photography and Rugged Grace Photography
Videography: Geovanny Flores
Officiant: Doctor Craig McMullen
Live Music: Dominique E. Dizon and Alicea Snow
Coordinator: A. Marie Events & Design LLC, with Anna Roberson
Hair: Shay Aguilar
Makeup: Nadine Troyer
